Conception Day = Heartbreak Day?

Been stressed up for the whole week.
Finally, I got something to 'relax' myself abit. I thought so....
The day before the Conception day, I met him again... Actually I waited him purposely and was thinking to talk to him...
He had few friends around him, just don't dare to talk to him...He glanced at me, I'm sure!
Saw him walking into the lecture hall, i was just so....
I then went to the toilet...
By the time i came out from the toilet, he came out from the gent and walked passed by me!
I did not have time to react, it was just too SUDDEN!!!
OMG!
I just didn't wanna give up!
I sat on the bench since I have no class that time so just wanna try my luck to see him again (he has 2 hours class so will have short break between)...I damn super PERVERT!
I really didn't expect he would come out from the lecture hall...
I don't know if the god wanted to give me chance, he just appeared and ALONE and just standing right in front of me!
DAMN STUPID me!
My butt just stuck on the bench, hesitated of approaching him!
Again walked passed my front and entered the hall again with his friends!
Watching him entered the hall, I was just too...
No choice, i had to go ler, I had tutorial class....

I called Charlie that night, telling her all these!
I told her I can only see him again 1 month later since we have break for 2 weeks and i have prac after the 2 weeks break!
She asked me not to be frustrated, and said I might get to see him tomorrow which is the conception day!
I just don't think he would go to the conception day...

Okay, yesterday was conception day!
I just did't expect anything!
It was just my luck!!!!!!!!!!!
I walked to the nab machine to withdraw money with Shir Li,
He and his friend just walked passed my side!!!!!!!!!!!!!
OMG! He was so CUTE!
Just tell me was this the fate? God wanted me to be friend with him!
I told myself I'll talk to him once I see him again later!

Shir Li and I went queue up to enter into the event's location which was just by the lake!
OMG!
I saw him in the crowd!
There were so many people but I actually saw him!
Just after entered, we went to the U@MQ 'cafe' to have a rest.
I realized he and his fellow friends just sat right in front of my vision in the 'balcony'!

I told Shir Li I wanted to talk to him, Shir Li 'encouraged' me by saying if you dare to talk to him then I'll give you 10 bucks!
Still, I didn't dare to.... Haiz....
I was just too surprised that whenever I went I just saw him!
Was I really meant to know him?
No... It was not....
After so many times I saw him in front of me....
I really wished that i didn't see this....
From far, I saw a girl walking next to him and they held each other's hands....
I was just....COLLAPSED!
I didn't tell Shir Li...
The second time saw him holding the girl's hand was in the 'cafe' again.
I actually saw him just pretended didn't see him....
Shir Li unintentionally... she said 'Look! your handsome guy!'. she didn't actually saw him holding a girl...
I told her I saw him and he was holding a girl....

So... I kept seeing him was not the fate to be friend with him... Was actually the fate to know that he already has a girlfriend...
What a really cruel reality for me....
I said inside of me... I didn't want to see him anymore and yea, I didn't see again after I saw him holding someone else....

I was soooooooo sad already!
We met Chun Shi and the gang....
H**** was really too much!!!!!!
I used to wear like this!
Know what he said! He just didn't think of other's feelings! I'm a girl, he shouldn't say like that!
He said if not wearing sexy then how to kena 'kaw' !
YES! I deserved it! I was nearly kena molested!
All just happened in one day!
I really shouldn't have gone to the conception day!

And now what?
I got sick just after the conception day!
I sick physically (got fever) and i really think sick spiritually....
Really feel heartbroken ler....