It hurts...

I miss you so badly...
I read my sister's friendster comment accidentally...
I didn't know she misses him so badly....
Yea...I think everyone of us miss him so badly...
She wrote that "will never see him making brother laughs, will never see his warm smile"...
Yes...We'll never see him again...
He's gone forever from our world...

Monday will be the 49th day....
Where will he be?
I've tried so hard not to think too much....
But I can't help myself to think....
I thought of those days we saw him lying in there, not moving at all....It just kills me....
I don't allow myself to shed a single tear...but what can i do?
I just can't....

I used to get a phone call from him every week...
I called him and talked crap...
But my phone will never shows his number again...
I'll never receive his phone call...no more...

He really had left me... left us...

I NEED MORE EXERCISE!!!!!!!!

It's been long since last I jogged.
Oh My Goodness! I really have to do more exercise ler!
I could hardly breathe man! I began to pant after 200 metres from MUV!
2oo METRES! Come on! It's such a short distance!
I managed to jog for 500 metres before, only started to pant!
Gosh! I old already!
I think I walked more than jogged man!
And it's freaking embarrassing when my landlord said "Are you okay ar? You don't look well." when I got home.
So embarrassing! I can't imagine how I looked! Must be pale la!
Haiyo haiyo!
Really must jog everyday ler!
I don't wanna become old lady!

Paper Cut...

I like this song of Vanessa Hudgens so much! I really want to share the lyrics here with you! Listen to the song if you would like to (highly recommended o!!!)!

It’s not a feeling like when you touch a flame

No, it’s not like when someone calls you a bad name

It’s not like the hurt when you slip and fall down

No, it’s not like any of these, what I’ve found is

Your love hurts like a paper cut, so sweet

never even feel the slice; you’re so deep

It seems so hard as, but only at first

Cause like a paper cut the pain grows worse.

Oh, oh

It’s not so much in the words that you don’t say

It’s when you act in the distant, cold way

It’s more in your eyes how you look at me

Like you no longer care for what I see

Your love hurts like a paper cut, so sweet

never even feel the slice; you’re so deep

It seems so hard as, but only at first

Cause like a paper cut the pain grows worse.

You had to go and show me just how good, your love could be

Then you threw it all away

Now I can’t help but feel a brand new pain

So I’m asking baby, please stay.

Your love hurts like a paper cut, so sweet

never even feel the slice; you’re so deep

It seems so hard as, but only at first

Cause like a paper cut the pain grows worse.

Oh, oh

Oh, oh

The pain grows worse

Oh, oh

Oh, oh

The pain grows worse

Oh, oh

The pains grows worse

What do you think? Nice, isn't it? Great description har!

What do you think of this?

Hmm... I didn't mean to take others' photo, I was just...just react spontaneously!
It's really very good and warm that you have a partner holding your hand, lending you his shoulder, hugging you when you feel cold...till the end of your life...
I always feel so happy for those people as in the photo.
How will my future be? I can't help myself to think about it...
For those people who lost their partners, how are they going to live without their partners?
Is it gonna be hurt when they lose them?
I don't know how the feeling will be...
I wonder how is she going to live her life...
I saw her pain, i saw her crying, i saw her denying the lost....
I don't know, really don't know what can i do for her...
But we can't be sad anymore, right?
I hope, really really hope that she can face and live strongly!

To my beloved XXX....

Sometimes I really think I'm crazy...
But I can't control myself for being so crazy!

Sometimes I feel I'm not myself...
Can't stop myself from thinking!
I know I can't think too much....
I'll get very emotional whenever I think of that....
I can't cry cause I don't want him to worry about me....
He needs to move on....
So I really have to help myself and him to move on...
To lead him to a better place...

I want everyone of us remember what he left us....
His smiling face, his caring, his love, his everything....
I know he wants us to be good...And I'm sure!
What to do...
All of these were just meant to be....
Nobody can change it....

I know he will be watching us somewhere....
And he knew he will always be in our hearts....

Thanks.....

Aloha~ It's been super long since my last blog entry! Yea, 3 months long!
Whatever!
No special thing to write about....
Just wanna say 'THANK YOU' to somebody....
Somebody said "YOU HAVE NOTHING TO LOSE, just go and talk and know him".
I really like this- "THERE'S NOTHING TO LOSE"!
So what should i scare? Shouldn't I grab my chance and go for it?
Yea, I think I should!

Thanks so much, SOMEBODY!