It hurts...

I miss you so badly...
I read my sister's friendster comment accidentally...
I didn't know she misses him so badly....
Yea...I think everyone of us miss him so badly...
She wrote that "will never see him making brother laughs, will never see his warm smile"...
Yes...We'll never see him again...
He's gone forever from our world...

Monday will be the 49th day....
Where will he be?
I've tried so hard not to think too much....
But I can't help myself to think....
I thought of those days we saw him lying in there, not moving at all....It just kills me....
I don't allow myself to shed a single tear...but what can i do?
I just can't....

I used to get a phone call from him every week...
I called him and talked crap...
But my phone will never shows his number again...
I'll never receive his phone call...no more...

He really had left me... left us...